How to be annoying during Lord of the Rings
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- Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait... where the hell is Harry Potter?"
- Block
the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" -
After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."
- Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says: "The Ring."
- Point and laugh whenever someone dies.
- Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.
- Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."
- When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way...!"
- Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.
- Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep" Monty Python style.
- When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"
- In "The Two Towers" when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN FOREST, RUN!"
- Every
time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!" See
how long it takes before you get kicked out of the theatre.
- During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"
- Start an Orc sing-a-long.
- Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.
- When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for tense moment and shout, "I see dead people!"
- Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.
- Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.
- Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.
- When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself go!"
- Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.
- When the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "May the Forest be With You!"
- Ask
people around you who they think is the next "Terminator" sent from the
Middle Earth of the future to assassinate Frodo Baggins
- When Shelob appears, pinch the guy in front of you on the back of the neck.
- At
some point during the movie, stand up and shout: "I must go! Middle
Earth needs me!" and run and try to jump into the screen. After
bouncing off, return quietly to your seat.
-
Stand outside the cinema with a donation box and a sign that reads:
"Orc preservation fund! Support the poor orc widows and children that
this vicious war leaves behind."
- Put on a pair of "Spock" ears and approach everyone in the cinema stating: "This is not logical"
- Sit in your seat with a high placard above you that reads: "Quiet please, wizard training in progress."
- Pass around a petition requesting the elves remain in Middle Earth.
- Paint
a toy sword with blue iridescent paint, stand in front of the cinema
with the sword held high and scream: "The orcs are coming! The orcs are
coming!"
- Stand in front of the screen for the
whole movie and whenever someone tells you to get out of the way, point
at a your finger and say with all ernest: "But I've got the ring on,
you can see right through me."
- Every 5 minutes, stand up and release a butterfly. One minute later stand up and complain: "Where is that damned bird?"